Hallmark Who?

Monday, October 10, 2011

I stood in the greeting card aisle for a good thirty minutes the other night, trying to pick ourt an Anniversary card for your dad.

Literally. I probably read every single card they had to offer, and each one, I sighed/scoffed and threw the card back on the shelf.

Hallmark really knows how to ruin things. I would find a visually appealing card, one that wasn't too over the top, and start to read the wording... and would nearly vomit. I mean, it was nothing short of a "Roses Are Red" poem. I can't GIVE THAT to my husband! How embarassing. And really, telling him that I "love him more than there are grains of sand on the beach and stars in the sky"? That's original.

The lesson here: you can never trust a Hallmark card. They are cheesy and overdone. If you need to find one in a pinch, try to find an understated card or start with a card that is blank on the inside, and write your own message. Hallmark tries too hard, and sometimes, the only thing that needs to be said is: I love you more than words can express, so I'm not even going to try.

Hallmark, if you're reading this: I'm willing to work freelance for you, so that your cards don't suck so badly. Call me.

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